verb [ trans. ]
1 give up completely (a course of action, a practice, or a way of thinking) : he had clearly abandoned all pretense of trying to succeed.
This is the specific definition that seemingly applies to me as of late. On the surface it looks as though I have abandoned my blog and reading yours as well, but I have merely been absent.
Who ever said "change is good"? I would argue that no change is good; along the lines of 'no news is good news'. Unfortunately, I've gotten a lot of news lately and change has already arrived and started unpacking it's bags.
If you've experienced labor, specifically if you were induced as I was, you know too well the waves of contractions that come one atop the other; overlapping before the last one has completed, not leaving enough time to catch your breath in between. Well, anyway, that was my labor and it lasted for 22 hours. The string of bad luck I've had lately has felt a lot like that; I can't even complete the task of addressing one issue before another presents itself. Just to be clear, none of this change involves the health and well being of my family or friends and that alone is a blessing. However, some of this news, that might normally be only a minor nuisance, has come quickly on the heels of other more pressing issues that have left me feeling very stressed and overwhelmed and forced me to focus elsewhere.
Training is still going on, it has to, it is what helps keep me sane.
One of the most terrifying of these changes has occurred with my job. This was the cherry on top of a multi-layered sundae of challenges and I'm holding the spoon trying to eat my through; make it all disappear. I didn't see it coming and yet, there it is. I'm trying very hard to be optimistic, keep perspective and move forward. However, I won't kid you, I'm scared. All of these recent events are making demands of me: my fortitude, dedication, loyalty, responsibility and stamina are all being put to the test. Trial by fire and so I put my feet to that fire and go! What choice is there? So here we are, come full circle to abandonment: give up completely (a course of action, a practice, or a way of thinking); not an option. I'm just hoping that you'll all still be here when you can, cuz I'll be there when I can.
The universe has closed a door, I'm just looking for an open window.